A Letter to My Dog, Half Pint

This last year may have been the worst one of my life, but at least I've got the world's two greatest dogs by my side to help me stagger into 2018. Today's post features a letter to Half Pint. Benjamin will be getting a letter later this week--he'd never let me hear the end of it, otherwise. Also, this posts features a lot of short video clips of Half Pint being silly. Since I apparently can't do anything right these days, they are exclusively shot in vertical mode. Please accept my apologies (and cut me some friggin' slack).

Weird Crime: Hog Wild and Hopelessly Lost

(photo @ wikipeida)

Chuluota, Florida

In the early morning hours of May 29, 2014, 24-year-old Andrew Joffe was lost on a dark highway (on foot) and being chased by pigs. That wasn't a derogatory term for the police, by the way...he was allegedly being pursued by wild boars.

Fortunately, Andrew had a cell phone he could use to call the police for assistance. After dialing 911, officers converged on his location and presumably chased off the rampaging bacon. They also discovered that Andrew had an outstanding warrant for driving with a suspended license.

Now at this point, Andrew's decision to call the authorities while being a wanted man might still make sense. Even if Andrew wasn't actually being chased by wild animals, he was lost on a dark highway in the middle of the night. I mean sure, he had a phone, but maybe it didn't have a GPS function.

When the police officers searched his backpack, however, they found a plethora of stolen items....including a handheld GPS system.

Andrew Joffe was arrested and taken to jail in Bartow, Florida. No charges are listed, but one can assume they included theft along with being a complete dumbass.

....but at least he'll be safe from the deadly pigs of the night.

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