A Letter to My Dog, Half Pint

This last year may have been the worst one of my life, but at least I've got the world's two greatest dogs by my side to help me stagger into 2018. Today's post features a letter to Half Pint. Benjamin will be getting a letter later this week--he'd never let me hear the end of it, otherwise. Also, this posts features a lot of short video clips of Half Pint being silly. Since I apparently can't do anything right these days, they are exclusively shot in vertical mode. Please accept my apologies (and cut me some friggin' slack).

Weird Crime: Disney and Guerrilla Performance Art Don't Mix

(photo @ wikipedia)

Tavernier, Florida

On the morning of January 10, 2014, anyone who walked into Coral Shores High School was greeted by what could generously be described as a disturbing sight. According to witnesses, 43-year-old Elizabeth Quintana was repeatedly hitting a white BMW with a bungee cord while brandishing a rock and threatening students who were entering the school.

An assistant principal immediately called the police. By the time the officers arrived, however, Quintana had already fled the scene. Fortunately for them, crazy people usually forget to do things like stopping for gas.

After traveling a few miles down the road, Quintana's BMW was found with an empty gas tank while blocking a lane of the highway. It was also covered with random statements written in pink marker. After checking its plates, the responding officers discovered that the car had been reported as stolen the day before.

Even car thieves are joining the fight against breast cancer.

There was also an unidentified male inside car, who claimed that he did not know Quintana and was simply hitching a ride to Key West. (This excuse normally wouldn't hold any water, but if you've ever been to Key West, someone hitching a ride with a crazy woman to get there shouldn't be too surprising).

Meanwhile, Quintana had gotten out of the car and was dancing on the lawn of a nearby church. According to the responding officers, she was wearing clothes which they described as "strange" and "wet." Her face was also covered in a white substance that was later identified as copious amounts of cocaine theatrical paint.

But arguably the most bizarre aspect of the incident was the fact that she was doing all this while muttering unintelligible statements about Disney.

Elizabeth Quintana was arrested and charged with grand theft auto, trespassing on school grounds, and disorderly conduct. Since this isn't her first run in with the law...and she identifies herself as an artist...we might be able to expect another crazy performance in the near future.

Hopefully with a lot less "theatrical paint" next time.

Please feel free to leave a comment below. If you'd like to sing my praises or tell me how terrible I am more personally, I can also be found on Twitter. 

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