A Letter to My Dog, Half Pint

This last year may have been the worst one of my life, but at least I've got the world's two greatest dogs by my side to help me stagger into 2018. Today's post features a letter to Half Pint. Benjamin will be getting a letter later this week--he'd never let me hear the end of it, otherwise. Also, this posts features a lot of short video clips of Half Pint being silly. Since I apparently can't do anything right these days, they are exclusively shot in vertical mode. Please accept my apologies (and cut me some friggin' slack).

Weird Crime: Duck, Duck, Boom

(photo @ wikiepdia)

Tarpon Springs, Florida

On the afternoon of November 16, 2013, 36-year-old Karie Lindgren was observed by her neighbors attempting to feed a duck. Karie had obviously not listened to the wise words of Mitch Hedberg about ducks and bread, instead opting to try and win the creature over with a piece of candy.

The duck, however, decided to reject her offer and walk away in the other direction. Whether this was because it truly did not like candy or its natural survival instincts kicked in is unclear. But according to one witness, Karie continued to "stalk" the duck after she had been rebuffed (making the survival instinct option look a lot more likely).

Now you have to admit, getting rejected by a duck that you are attempting to provide free food has to feel a little deflating. But that's no reason to enact violent revenge upon a defenseless animal.

Unfortunately, Karie refused to let this duck's slight against her go unpunished. She got into her car, drove across someone's lawn, and ran the duck over, killing it.

After the police were notified about the incident, Karie Lindgren was arrested and charged with one felony count of animal cruelty. She is currently being held on $5,000 bond in the Pinellas County Jail. She was also unable to attend her first court appearance due to what the deputies described as uncooperative behavior.

Reports that she was demanding plum sauce and 
peeled tangerines in her cell cannot be confirmed at this time.

Please feel free to leave a comment below. If you'd like to sing my praises or tell me how terrible I am more personally, I can also be found on Twitter. 

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