A Letter to My Dog, Half Pint

This last year may have been the worst one of my life, but at least I've got the world's two greatest dogs by my side to help me stagger into 2018. Today's post features a letter to Half Pint. Benjamin will be getting a letter later this week--he'd never let me hear the end of it, otherwise. Also, this posts features a lot of short video clips of Half Pint being silly. Since I apparently can't do anything right these days, they are exclusively shot in vertical mode. Please accept my apologies (and cut me some friggin' slack).

Weird Crime Wednesday: No one likes to get smacked on the butt when they're sunburned

Bethlehem, Pennsylvania

On the evening of August 6, 2012, 24-year-old Tiffany Sherry was suffering from a very bad sunburn. Not one to let that keep her from finishing some household chores, however, she pushed through the pain continued to wash the dishes.

In the meantime, her boyfriend, Michael Martinez, decided that this would be a perfect opportunity for a playful/surprise butt smack. He was well aware that Tiffany's sunburn would cause her to feel a significant amount of pain, but decided it would be a "funny" thing to do, anyway.

As you might imagine, Tiffany strongly disagreed.

She immediately spun around from behind the sink brandishing a large steak knife. Michael quickly came to the realization that his girlfriend was about to repay the pain he had just caused her in spades. He backed into the living room, where Tiffany's children were playing...and could possibly make the perfect shield against the impending attack.

"What are you going  to do, stab me in front of your children?" Michael asked. At that moment, Tiffany came to her senses, calmed herself a bit...and asked her children to quickly leave the room.

She then proceeded to stab Michael in the stomach and shoulder. As he turned to flee the premises, Tiffany stabbed him again in the upper back while screaming that she was going to kill him.

Michael ran back to his house and called the police. He was taken to St. Luke's Hospital for treatment while Tiffany was arrested and charged with aggravated assault, simple assault, making terroristic threats (seriously?), and reckless endangerment. She is being held on $25,000 bond in the North Hampton County Prison (with hear preliminary hearing scheduled for August 16).

This not the first time Tiffany has used a kitchen utensil to dole out some homemade justice; she was also arrested in 2008 for stabbing a man with a fork due to an argument over diapers.

Note to the prison staff: At meal time, draw the line at spoons.

Please feel free to leave a comment below. If you'd like to sing my praises or tell me how terrible I am more personally, I can also be found on Twitter.

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