A Letter to My Dog, Half Pint

This last year may have been the worst one of my life, but at least I've got the world's two greatest dogs by my side to help me stagger into 2018. Today's post features a letter to Half Pint. Benjamin will be getting a letter later this week--he'd never let me hear the end of it, otherwise.

Also, this posts features a lot of short video clips of Half Pint being silly. Since I apparently can't do anything right these days, they are exclusively shot in vertical mode. Please accept my apologies (and cut me some friggin' slack).

A "Why I love teaching middle school" Moment: Making Kids Think They're Crazy

(photo @ polistas.com)




Middle school students can be enormously frustrating to work with, but they also can make for an excellent source of entertainment and unsuspecting subjects for practical jokes.

Like many male public school teachers, I have a rotation of dress shirts that I run through before laundry day.  Sometimes without thinking (or because I just don't notice), I will go through these shirts in the same order for a few cycles.

I knew this had become a problem when a student was said to me "Mr N, why are you wearing a red shirt?  Don't you usually wear the blue shirt on Tuesdays?"


                                                          davidshannonnelson.com
Good thing they don't see what I wear on Saturdays



I decided to change things up and make a conscience effort to randomly choose which shirts I wore on each day of the week.

Why I cared about what 11-14 year kids thought about my fashion sense, I do not know.  But it was a bit of an embarrassing eye opener  to know that my clothing choices had become so laughibly predictable.


                                                         blogs.philadelphiaweekly.com
Tim Gunn's disapproving stare was also beginning to take it's toll.


During my first period class that year, I had an excellent 7th grade flute player named Carie.  She was not only a very good young musician, but she was also incredibly observant; sometimes to the point of unfounded paranoia.  As I started mixing up my shirt rotation, Carie began to suspect that something had changed.

A few times a week, she would see me in the afternoon or at after school band rehearsal and accuse/inquire of me "Mr. N, did you change shirts?  I'm certain that you were wearing a different colored shirt this morning in class."

Before any of you assume that this was a joke or sarcasm on her part, this was usually accompanied with a demeaning facial expression that clearly translated (in flute, which is a language) to: "What type of psycho teacher changes their clothes in the middle of the day?"


                                                                                      bunspace.com
This rabbit's disapproval, coming instead from a 12 year old girl



So one day, I decided to do exactly what Carie thought I was doing.

I wore a grey button down shirt to school that day and brought a red one as well.  I told all the students I saw that morning (who also knew of Carie's weekly fashion inquisitions) not to let her in on the joke.  Surprisingly and maybe for one of the first times in middle school history, a secret was kept (a small morning class and being in my office before school helped).

After Carie's class ended, I went into my office and changed into my red shirt.  As I strolled through the lunch room later that afternoon, Carie saw me...and completely flipped out  The following exchange took place:

Carie:  Mr. N!! I know that you changed shirts today!

Me:  Umm...no, this is the same shirt I wore to school today; just like it is every day you accuse me of changing shirts during school.

Carie:  No, Mr. N.  I know I'm right this time.  You were wearing a different shirt this morning than you are right now!  I can see it in my mind!!!"

Me:  Sorry Carie, but just like all the other times you say that I changed shirts, I did not.  Maybe you're just crazy."

Carrie:  I know what I saw, Mr N!  I'M NOT CRAZY!!!"


                                                             adrenalinesshadow.wordpress.com
Furthermore, I am Shiva, goddess of death!



At this point, more than a few students turned to observe Carie's high pitched and hilariously ironic defense of her mental stability.

Me:  I think you just proved my point.

I smiled and walked away.  Carie sat at her lunch table with a look that may have been an early warning sign for spontaneous combustion.  Later that day at after school band rehearsal, Carie continued to stick to her story.

Carrie:  "I know what I saw, and I know you changed shirts from the one you wore this morning.  I know it!"

Me:  Just like every day you say I do that, right Carrie?

The other students smiled and chuckled while Carie began to breathe actual fire and smoke from her nostrils.

I figured that the joke could only be allowed to go on for so long before it went from being funny to being mean. I told the students that they didn't need to keep the secret anymore and finally let Carie in on the joke...

...about three weeks later.

                                         affordablehousinginstitute.org
Pictured:  My impact as educator that day





Comments

Connor said…
Did you do this while I was at Laing?
Nick Nafpliotis said…
Yes--you were in 6th grade. I tend to let the 6th graders off the hook before I begin my campaign of terror in the form of elaborate pranks.
GMSoccerPicks said…
Hahaha that was innocent yet very funny prank. I bet the little girl was pretty upset after she found out the truth hahaah
Charles Godfrey said…
Your Saturday shirt made me dizzy... o.0
Zoe said…
poor thing. I am sure she is either in therapy now or in jail.
Nick Nafpliotis said…
No...she is in color guard :)
Abby said…
As a middle school reading teacher, my students could tell what we were going to do each day by what I wore. If I wore khakis, a school staff shirt, and walking shoes - it was library day (hey, it's a trek and I have to make it 6 times a day). If I have on a skirt and heels - we are going to do some whole class lessons. If I am wearing dress pants and am barefoot in the classroom - we will be laying on the floor doing silent reading. I love it when they get to the point in the year when they figure that out!

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